Michael & The Gang

Helel and Michael's "war" was more of a heated discussion. Considering that archangels weren't equipped with emotions, "heated" was a pretty big deal, so it makes sense that humans would blow the whole creation story out of proportion. --"Twins Michael and Helel" (c) 2023 C. Lysette & R. G. Breus

In The Beginning
According to Judeo-Christian mythology, Lucifer fell to Earth after being defeated by Archangel Michael. The naughty angel, said to be consumed by pride and desire for the divine throne, landed on a blackberry bush. He cursed it, spat on it, stomped it with his hooves, and then urinated on it to show his utter disdain for the prickly bramble. In all, that fateful October 11th was a no good, very bad day for who would become God's archnemesis and humanity's fall guy for all eternity.

Early Christians loved this story so much, they decided to deem Lucifer's eviction from Heaven a holy day. To add salt to the fallen angel's wounds, the Christians named this holy day of October 11 “Michael’s Mass.” But when the first European countries made the switch from the Julian to the Gregorian calendar in 1582, Michael’s Mass--now "Michaelmas"--was moved up from October 11 to September 29, and European Christians still celebrate it to this day.

Dancing On The Head Of A Pin
But if you give just one angel his holy day, all the other angels are gonna start huffing and complaining. Thunder starts rumbling, lightning starts streaking, a village goes up in flames, and then nobody’s happy. Gabriel and Raphael were lucky enough, as they had stellar public relations with the humans. The two angels would be awarded their own feast days in the spring and autumn, respectively. Alongside Michael, that's only three angels, though, and we all know there’s a hell of a lot more angels than that, pardon my language.

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